Zodstragcar is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, cheerful gerbil.

Zodstragcar created carbon nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zodstragcar, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Zodstragcar, she will turn you into a rat.

Zodstragcar's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Zodstragcar's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place in orange.

2. Always make sure there are no sheep in a room before entering it.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Always obey Zodstragcar's priests.

5. Erect nine silicon sculptures of Zodstragcar on top of important buildings.