Tadkenlik is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, thoughtless turtle.

Tadkenlik created silver nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tadkenlik, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Tadkenlik, he will refuse to believe in you.

Tadkenlik's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Tadkenlik's Holy Commandments

1. Never sprint near goats.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never look at moons.

5. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.