Gan Habfarnved is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, able mole.

Gan Habfarnved created a quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gan Habfarnved, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Gan Habfarnved, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Gan Habfarnved's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Gan Habfarnved's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair orange.

2. Never hurt dogs.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate sharks.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gan Habfarnved.

5. Never paint your feet purple.