Bapnig is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, annoying faun.

Bapnig created the Milkyway five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bapnig, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Bapnig, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Bapnig's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Bapnig's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Bapnig.

3. Never write about nebulae.

4. Run away if seven frogs approach from the west.

5. Fast once a month.