Flisminomtfumdadnakbeg is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, awe-inspiring cobra.

Flisminomtfumdadnakbeg created the planet Saturn two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flisminomtfumdadnakbeg, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Flisminomtfumdadnakbeg, he will destroy your home planet.

Flisminomtfumdadnakbeg's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Flisminomtfumdadnakbeg's Holy Commandments

1. Erect eight tin sculptures of Flisminomtfumdadnakbeg on top of important buildings.

2. Never feed grapes to swans while wearing blue shorts.

3. Flisminomtfumdadnakbeg loves turtles, so they must be honoured.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Never write about archaea.