Sawpasgub is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, stupid hedgehog.

Sawpasgub created the planet Jupiter two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sawpasgub, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Sawpasgub, he will be very unhappy.

Sawpasgub's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Sawpasgub's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dwarf planets.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Sawpasgub.

3. Hide if seven seals approach from the north.

4. Do not trade with those who eat tomatoes.

5. Never wear shirts.