Bongidlag Quimsidcissjin is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, merciful cow.

Bongidlag Quimsidcissjin created life two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bongidlag Quimsidcissjin, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Bongidlag Quimsidcissjin, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Bongidlag Quimsidcissjin's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Bongidlag Quimsidcissjin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Bongidlag Quimsidcissjin must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Do not wear iron on your body.

5. Never think about asteroids.