Cimtettitag is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, witless hedgehog.

Cimtettitag created tapeworms five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cimtettitag, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Cimtettitag, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Cimtettitag's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Cimtettitag's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from gray badgers, for they are unholy.

2. Do not eat tomatoes.

3. Never write about quantum mechanics.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never write about enzymes.