Dusscattomtal is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, wise octopus.

Dusscattomtal created the Sunflower Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dusscattomtal, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dusscattomtal, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Dusscattomtal's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Dusscattomtal's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about solid mechanics near monkeys while wearing brown skirts and balancing six lead spheres on your back.

2. Never feed lots of lemons to sharks while wearing turquoise boots.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Do not wear fawn clothing.