Bassbessbun is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, compassionate fox.

Bassbessbun created Asia nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Bassbessbun, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Bassbessbun, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Bassbessbun's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Bassbessbun's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick grasshopers.

2. Do not eat pineapples.

3. Never hurt geese.

4. Never wear corsets.

5. Respect your elders.