Cebcedvagpomontfonjabceb is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, blissful goblin.

Cebcedvagpomontfonjabceb created the Sun five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cebcedvagpomontfonjabceb, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Cebcedvagpomontfonjabceb, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Cebcedvagpomontfonjabceb's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Cebcedvagpomontfonjabceb's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat spinach.

2. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Cebcedvagpomontfonjabceb.

4. Never go into brown rooms.

5. Always help dogs.