Quagkadont is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, compassionate armadillo.

Quagkadont created parasitic wasps four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quagkadont, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Quagkadont, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Quagkadont's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Quagkadont's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. You must never eat wheat.

3. Pray towards the east.

4. Do not shave your neck.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Quagkadont.