Padhughot is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, unselfish turtle.

Padhughot created the Sombrero Galaxy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Padhughot, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Padhughot, he will jump up and down on your head.

Padhughot's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Padhughot's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed wheat to manatees while wearing mauve scarves.

2. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Pray towards the west.