Jarnzedweg is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, unfair bird.

Jarnzedweg created energy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Jarnzedweg, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Jarnzedweg, it will have a low opinion of you.

Jarnzedweg's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Jarnzedweg's Holy Commandments

1. Jarnzedweg loves whales, so they must be respected.

2. Do not kill monkeys.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Do not keep three otters in a large pit.

5. Do not stand on grass.