Govgofzankadhomcad is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, wise beaver.

Govgofzankadhomcad created vertebrates nine million years ago.

If you believe in Govgofzankadhomcad, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Govgofzankadhomcad, it will not care at all.

Govgofzankadhomcad's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Govgofzankadhomcad's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Govgofzankadhomcad.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Never pour water over plants.