Cutarm is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, deceitful crab.

Cutarm created an electron four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cutarm, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Cutarm, he will turn you into a duck.

Cutarm's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Cutarm's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Do not hurt geese.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Respect your elders.