Gabmithom is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, weak cat.

Gabmithom created a bottom quark nine million years ago.

If you believe in Gabmithom, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Gabmithom, it will turn you into a goat.

Gabmithom's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Gabmithom's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of turnips to dogs while wearing purple jumpers.

2. Never eat garlic.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Always make sure there are no birds in a building before entering it.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate ants.