Narteendid is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, sage tortoise.

Narteendid created a photon six million years ago.

If you believe in Narteendid, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Narteendid, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Narteendid's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Narteendid's Holy Commandments

1. Always help foxes.

2. Put Narteendid first in all things.

3. Never wear scarves.

4. Do not drink water in orange rooms.

5. Never write about planets.