Cubkomget is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, duplicitous hippopotamus.

Cubkomget created energy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cubkomget, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Cubkomget, she will turn you into a slug.

Cubkomget's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Cubkomget's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Never talk about dolphins.

3. Erect nine copper sculptures of Cubkomget on top of important buildings.

4. Always wear gray.

5. Never feed lots of beans to geese while wearing brown tights.