Kiptomtag is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, wise monkey.

Kiptomtag created a strange quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Kiptomtag, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Kiptomtag, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Kiptomtag's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Kiptomtag's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear shirts.

2. Always look after injured otters.

3. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.