Yogmitrow is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, resourceful lion.

Yogmitrow created carbon five million years ago.

If you believe in Yogmitrow, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Yogmitrow, he will not invite you to parties.

Yogmitrow's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Yogmitrow's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear trousers.

2. You must love Yogmitrow.

3. Do not wear titanium on your body.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

5. Never write about gravity.