Narlidpas is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, stupid spider.

Narlidpas created snails four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Narlidpas, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Narlidpas, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Narlidpas' most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Narlidpas' Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Never leap in the presence of moths.

4. Porpoises are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Always obey Narlidpas' priests.