Nutgiglamarpdavhimjip is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, temperamental seal.

Nutgiglamarpdavhimjip created a strange quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nutgiglamarpdavhimjip, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Nutgiglamarpdavhimjip, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Nutgiglamarpdavhimjip's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Nutgiglamarpdavhimjip's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Worship no other gods but Nutgiglamarpdavhimjip.

3. Never write about gravity.

4. Never wear kilts.

5. Pray towards the east.