Padcan is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, two-faced scorpion.

Padcan created the Large Magellanic Cloud eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Padcan, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Padcan, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Padcan's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Padcan's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry doves.

2. Do not jump in public.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not take Padcan's name in vain.

5. Erect three copper sculptures of Padcan on top of important buildings.