Gumcissvil is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, unfair crab.

Gumcissvil created the Milkyway four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gumcissvil, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Gumcissvil, it will send minions to preach to you.

Gumcissvil's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Gumcissvil's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never talk about gravity.

5. Do not kill doves.