Hadfitbep is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, bad-tempered dove.

Hadfitbep created Africa nine million years ago.

If you believe in Hadfitbep, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Hadfitbep, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Hadfitbep's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Hadfitbep's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if nine otters approach from the north.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Do not shave your arms.

4. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

5. Always help gulls.