Vantarrutt is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, merciless seal.

Vantarrutt created the planet Earth two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vantarrutt, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Vantarrutt, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Vantarrutt's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Vantarrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat figs.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate eagles.

4. Never talk about manatees.

5. Never look at comets.