Libtam Arpdagdadvig is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, unselfish dugong.

Libtam Arpdagdadvig created parasitic wasps four billion years ago.

If you believe in Libtam Arpdagdadvig, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Libtam Arpdagdadvig, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Libtam Arpdagdadvig's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Libtam Arpdagdadvig's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate seals.

3. Never wear kilts.

4. Do not speak about lentils.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.