Monquafbin is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, narcissistic otter.

Monquafbin created a bottom quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Monquafbin, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Monquafbin, he will destroy your favourite star.

Monquafbin's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Monquafbin's Holy Commandments

1. Always help foxes.

2. Never look at stars.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. You must love Monquafbin.

5. Do not stand on grass.