Queegwipbosspopcumgess is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, all-powerful monkey.

Queegwipbosspopcumgess created the planet Earth three billion years ago.

If you believe in Queegwipbosspopcumgess, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Queegwipbosspopcumgess, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Queegwipbosspopcumgess' most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Queegwipbosspopcumgess' Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate doves.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never look at planets.