Sawgat is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, unthoughtful octopus.

Sawgat created Asia six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sawgat, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Sawgat, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Sawgat's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Sawgat's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate badgers.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Never skip in the presence of sharks.

4. You must never eat pineapples.

5. Do not wear titanium on your body.