Quag is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, contented unicorn.

Quag created gold five million years ago.

If you believe in Quag, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Quag, he will strike you with lightening.

Quag's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Quag's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from orange pigs for they are unholy.

2. Do not shave your hands.

3. Do not dye your hair turquoise.

4. Never wear blue shirts.

5. Never talk about stars.