Bityattpit is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, idiotic dolphin.

Bityattpit created the Cigar Galaxy two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bityattpit, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bityattpit, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Bityattpit's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Bityattpit's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Never bounce near badgers.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

4. Do not trade with those who eat bananas.

5. Run away if five cats approach from the south.