Ditlenhug is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, benevolent newt.

Ditlenhug created the Milkyway eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ditlenhug, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Ditlenhug, she will not invite you to parties.

Ditlenhug's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Ditlenhug's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep three frogs in a large pit.

2. Do not speak about cucumbers.

3. Always help sick ducks.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Never think about planets.