Bastveenget is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, smart bee.

Bastveenget created Mount Everest nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Bastveenget, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Bastveenget, it will turn you into a worm.

Bastveenget's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Bastveenget's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity.

2. Do not take Bastveenget's name in vain.

3. Never feed strawberries to snails while wearing blue rings.

4. Do not sprint in public.

5. Never paint your back green.