Dissjopjen is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, temperamental hamster.

Dissjopjen created the Sunflower Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Dissjopjen, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Dissjopjen, it will manifest in front of you.

Dissjopjen's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Dissjopjen's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Always help sick voles.

4. Never talk about enzymes.

5. Always make sure there are no frogs in a room before entering it.