Artdapsaf is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, generous gnu.

Artdapsaf created vertebrates two billion years ago.

If you believe in Artdapsaf, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Artdapsaf, he will turn you into a dog.

Artdapsaf's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Artdapsaf's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large tin sculpture of Artdapsaf on top of all buildings.

2. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Artdapsaf.

4. Do not trade with those who eat rice.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.