Homfosslik is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, impressive donkey.

Homfosslik created humankind eight million years ago.

If you believe in Homfosslik, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Homfosslik, it will not care at all.

Homfosslik's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Homfosslik's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Never talk about quantum gravity near shrews while wearing brown hats and balancing four gold spheres on your back.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Always obey Homfosslik's priests.