Quilldittabsit is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, deceitful squid.

Quilldittabsit created the Large Magellanic Cloud nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Quilldittabsit, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Quilldittabsit, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Quilldittabsit's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Quilldittabsit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Always make sure there are no shrews in a room before entering it.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.