Afgeplab is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, staggering gnu.

Afgeplab created energy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Afgeplab, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Afgeplab, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Afgeplab's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Afgeplab's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about amino acids.

2. Never talk about sharks.

3. Never go into orange rooms.

4. Never laugh in holy places.

5. Do not hurt cats.