Arfzigstigrat is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, caring pig.

Arfzigstigrat created the Tadpole Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arfzigstigrat, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Arfzigstigrat, it will throw large rocks at you.

Arfzigstigrat's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Arfzigstigrat's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never eat peas.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never write about ribonucleic acid.