Batgutzenfatwipnabcipgil is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, amazing crocodile.

Batgutzenfatwipnabcipgil created viruses six billion years ago.

If you believe in Batgutzenfatwipnabcipgil, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Batgutzenfatwipnabcipgil, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Batgutzenfatwipnabcipgil's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Batgutzenfatwipnabcipgil's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Rats are not to be trusted.

3. Do not wear black clothing.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near birds while wearing blue coats and balancing six gold spheres on your arms.