Linpodwee is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, awesome raccoon.

Linpodwee created a down quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Linpodwee, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Linpodwee, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Linpodwee's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Linpodwee's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never adorn your hands with pink markings.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Never talk about gravity near snakes while wearing gray skirts.

5. Never feed garlic to swans while wearing brown ear rings.