Bonksafdim is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, thoughtless goose.

Bonksafdim created the Milkyway eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Bonksafdim, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Bonksafdim, she will remove you from existence.

Bonksafdim's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Bonksafdim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. You must pray to Bonksafdim nine times a day.

4. Bonksafdim loves aardvarks, so they must be honoured.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.