Yimjadfum is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, self-confident chinchilla.

Yimjadfum created energy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yimjadfum, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Yimjadfum, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Yimjadfum's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Yimjadfum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Do not gather at doors at dawn.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never talk about optics.

5. Always wear magenta.