Cipwanranstikhatjap Sterrawfar Xuckdudfoss is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, astonishing squid.

Cipwanranstikhatjap Sterrawfar Xuckdudfoss created water four years ago.

If you believe in Cipwanranstikhatjap Sterrawfar Xuckdudfoss, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Cipwanranstikhatjap Sterrawfar Xuckdudfoss, it will turn you into a rat.

Cipwanranstikhatjap Sterrawfar Xuckdudfoss' most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Cipwanranstikhatjap Sterrawfar Xuckdudfoss' Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Cipwanranstikhatjap Sterrawfar Xuckdudfoss.

2. Do not wear red clothing.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Never approach mountains carrying clay.

5. Never write about archaea.