Sidladsug is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, sage porpoise.

Sidladsug created Mount Everest four million years ago.

If you believe in Sidladsug, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Sidladsug, it will turn you into a dog.

Sidladsug's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Sidladsug's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of limes to dogs while wearing turquoise shirts.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Do not count beyond five during ceremonies.

4. Always help foxes.

5. Do not keep six gulls in a large pit.