Bigcumcud is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, merciless swan.

Bigcumcud created dark matter twelve years ago.

If you believe in Bigcumcud, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Bigcumcud, he will try to impress you with trees.

Bigcumcud's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Bigcumcud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Never speak of order in the presence of children.

3. Never travel toward the east during summer.

4. Pray towards the west.

5. Always stare at clouds.