Mabtifwik is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, stupid unicorn.

Mabtifwik created vertebrates three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Mabtifwik, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Mabtifwik, she will destroy your home planet.

Mabtifwik's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Mabtifwik's Holy Commandments

1. Never chant in the presence of elders.

2. Mice are not to be trusted.

3. Never gather seven swans in one place.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Do not dye your hair turquoise.