Bogtarfas is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, thoughtless gorilla.

Bogtarfas created the Large Magellanic Cloud three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bogtarfas, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bogtarfas, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Bogtarfas' most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Bogtarfas' Holy Commandments

1. Never allow shrews to sleep beneath your roof.

2. Retreat if four voles approach from the east.

3. Heed all visions.

4. Do not speak sacred words in summer.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.